Dominating My Emotions

"A man who is master of himself can end a sorrow as easily as he can invent a pleasure. I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them." ~ Oscar Wilde

Wow, what a powerful statement! I want to first break down two words; enjoy and dominate.

Dominate (verb) - 1. to rule over; govern; control 2. to rule; exercise control; predominate 3. to occupy a commanding or elevated position

Enjoy  (verb) - 1. to experience with joy; take pleasure in 2. to find or experience pleasure for oneself

This comes back to the circle of my theme, changing the way we think. I have spoken before about David Foster Wallace and his commencement speech. While I will not list the quote again, he basically says we need to see view the world we are in. Let me remind you of the fish in the water and not knowing what water is.

If we do not know what our life is, how can we be the masters of ourselves? Furthermore how can we be true to ourselves, who we are? We need to live each day as it is our own. Additionally we need to do what will make us happy. How else would you want to live your last day?

Another person I am going to go back to is Thich Nhat Hanh and his "The Heart of the Buddha's Teaching".  "The fist first kind of suffering is 'the suffering of suffering' (dukkha dukkhata), the suffering associated with unpleasant feelings, like the pain of a toothache, losing your temper, or feeling too cold on a winter's day." pg 19.

Now here is a concept that is hard to grasp. Even impossible to remember at times of suffering. We need to recognize suffering when it is present and to recognize joy when suffering is absent. How often do we truly do this in our lives? Do we complain and dwell on another problem in our lives without acknowledging the other joys in our lives? I know I do.

"When we have a toothache, we know that not having a toothache is happiness. But later, when we don't have a toothache, we don't treasure our non-toothache. Practicing mindfulness helps us learn to appreciate the well-being that is already there." pg 41.

What a recurring theme. Changing the way we think, how we perceive. Being more mindful of ourselves and the world we live in is not an easy task. I know this is something that I must learn, practice. If I am ever to get over my resentment and hatred, I must be more mindful.

To me being more mindful is to take control. Dominating my thoughts and emotions so I can enjoy not only life, but who I am. My last little episode of shaving my head has left me thinking about who I am once again. What is it that will make me happy.  I know what my heart says, what my mind says. Sometimes the strength is missing and it is hard to grasp the courage, support and understanding of such actions. Living each day as your last. Tell those you love, that you love them each and every day. You never know when it will be the last. Find the joys, the absence of suffering in everything you can.

"Freedom is the will to be responsible to ourselves." ~ Friedrich Nietzsche